5 Ways to Be The Man Every Woman is Looking For
Let’s be honest here: The title of this article either intrigued you or aggravated you to the point where you just had to click it. How could this random guy on the internet know what every woman wants? What an idiot.
Who is he to tell us how to date? How to live? How to be?
I will tell you one thing, in nearly a decade of writing and speaking about human relationships, I have yet to find someone who disagrees with the points I am about to make here.
So crack those knuckles and get your typing fingers ready to rebut me in the comments, but bring your reasoning and evidence with you.
1. Be adventurous, but also stable.
Stability does not have to be boring, and adventure does not have to uproot your entire life. Many relationships get stale because there is no excitement left, no thrill, no passion – and much of that fades because routine takes over and we become complacent.
Effort into a relationship should not cease when the relationship is established. Just the opposite, actually. The world begins when someone commits themselves to us, that’s not where it ends.
We need to show the woman in our life that we are still just as ambitious and driven towards our own personal goals as when she first met us, particularly since that’s likely one of the things that attracted her in the first place.
But, you don’t do it for her. You do it for yourself. Living a vibrant and passionate life is more attractive than we could explain. And, it brings about opportunities to have new experiences you can share together, while still building a stable foundation.
Balance is key here, and if you are truly pursuing what makes you (and her) happy in life, boredom won’t be a problem.
2. Challenge her, but also support her.
Men and women have naturally different strengths due to biological evolution. Our neurological makeup is different and we therefore see and approach things differently.
Related recommended reading: The Female Brain.
For that reason, we may see things that she doesn’t, and vice versa. The female brain is better at anticipating pain and detecting danger, so perhaps instead of thinking women are just being emotional and overreacting, we should pay attention to something she might be seeing before us.
Conversely, men are typically problem solvers and more results-driven. This gives us an opportunity to help her see different potential paths to meeting a goal, through supporting her journey. Not through telling her what to do. Not through trying to be a “fixer.” Not through giving advice where it isn’t asked for…
Simply through supporting her while she figures it out on her own.
3. Empower her, but also protect her.
Women are fully autonomous adult humans who are capable of taking care of themselves, but that doesn’t mean she wants you to stop being “the man.”
The biological realities of the human animal have to be acknowledged and respected, they are ingrained within us whether we like it or not. And, through conversations, seminars, writings, TV interviews, and more – I have repeatedly heard from women that they do not want the man to give up his masculine role and energy in a relationship.
We just need to understand that empowering HER feminine energy, does NOT take away from our masculine.
We should still strive to make the women around us feel secure and protected, both emotionally and physically, even if they can protect themselves.
4. Tempt her, but also respect her.
Sexual chemistry is of the utmost importance to any intimate relationship, but it needs to be established in a way that both people feel completely comfortable with. Society has fed us a false narrative that women’s sex drives are not as strong as men’s (they’ve done this by suppressing conversations, images, topics, etc., around a woman’s sex drive through making them feel badly about having human desires).
The reality is, women desire a deep sexual and intimate connection just as much as men do, they just approach it in a different way. Men are much more “analog” where we can flip a switch and go. Women traditionally have to feel more secure and comfortable with their partner in order to enjoy the full experience.
By showing up for her in a way that lets her know she is still respected regardless of what desires she does (or doesn’t) act on, adds an extra layer of foundation to the relationship that strengthens your bond and enhances your experiences together on all levels.
5. Make her feel sexy, but also make her feel safe.
The reality is that we live in a world where many people (men and women alike) hold back on showing their true selves from fear of judgment…or in some cases…fear of violence.
As difficult as it is to admit this, it is the truth of our reality and we need to adjust how we act accordingly.
Building a foundation of trust through communication and honesty helps to show your partner that she can open up and be her true self with you. As we become more comfortable with a person, we are more free in expressing ourselves to them in all ways.
Stronger relationships are built not only when she knows how sexy you think she is, but when she feels completely safe allowing you to see and experience her fullest self.
The two must exist in harmony, and they will grow together over time – as will you both as individuals, and as a couple.